EPIC FAIL
An anonymous user sent me this pic. Yes, this is real, as in not some photo klepto’d from College Humor or Google. Go ahead, try to find it. Up until the very moment of this post, we are the only ones that have this pic.
The anonymous note left with this pic in our HTT inbox:
Attached find a pic my friend took of a girl in a bathroom in Buckheads “The Ivy” bar and restaurant. How it could have possibly occurred, i know not. I do know that this was a still pose, and not caught in the moment of falling.
Thank you Mr. Anonymous for this pic. Now for the breakdown:
Look at this chick. GA Tech all the way. First impressions are mixed at best, I give her credit for at least getting her panties down (or at least wearing panties for that matter) and that she is actually stuck and passed out in this position.
I can just see this broad bee-boppin’ into this restroom all stublin’ and fumblin’ around, probably shoulder checking some hotter-than-she-is blonde at the door and quipping, ‘Watch out you fucking bitch!”. However, it probably sounded more like, “Wassssschiout, you fuck—-ing BITCH!” all slurred and mostly beyond recognition.
Next, this ‘Apple of Daddy’s eye’ barrels into the stall with an ill-appreciated yet exuberent way-too-loud exclamation of ‘Oh my fucking God, I gotta PEEEEEEE!”. ‘Blop’ goes the purse close to the door of the stall because in the minds of girls such as these (typical pretentious Tech types), she would rather sink her face in piss rather than risking that precious Coach leather sopping up someone else’s ammonia infused bodily fluid. What’s good for my face is not good enough for my purse….
Just about the time her evacuation is complete: slipping, slipping…sssllliiippiinngggg….SUNK over, face full of piss, eternal Dawg lovin’ damnation.
Judging by the lone bit of tissue by her purse, this Techie had to blow her nose. One would think, “hey, throw that shit into the toilet, you’re gonna flush it anyway”, but that is oh so hard to do when your entire torso is over the toilet and your lips are kissing the piss soaked floor.
Notice the toilet paper above and around the toilet paper dispenser. These were thrown around in an effort to send a ‘SOS’ of sorts. And when you lose that much control on some pucker watermelon shots, that took some effort. But that hot blonde that she checked when she got into the restroom probably took note that this girl was a train-wreck waiting to happen. And in her mind, as long as this bitch was breathing, there was no need for help. Or maybe her version of help was to take this photo and send it to me.
Typical Tech bullshit. Girls wanting to drink like UGA women! What a joke. A UGA woman would have never been in this situation because 1) she is not a dork who never drinks. She can hold her liquor and has more class than that. and 2) Always rolls deep enough that even if by some chance she winds up in this situation, her friends are getting her off of that toilet and whoopin’ any bitch’s ass who is taking pictures. Although it should be said that a UGA woman would also take this picture and send it to Inspector G, which is witty AND classy.
Have fun losing more recruits because you’re chicks look like this.
God, I didn’t even get to that awful vest she has on. Is that fucking denim?
-Inspector G